It is 3:33 AM here and I am praying that God will smite the church as he did in the time of Jesus, driving the Christians from their comfort and into the arms of the crying, bleeding and dying world. I see the Christians, now saved from the horror of their sin, heaping to themselves cars, houses and rewards that were meant to come to them in heaven. I watch them gather to honor God while ignoring the pain and suffering around the world and cry.  How can we be so blind and comfortable when our family is in jail, suffering for the Gospel?

My church, my church, how often have I sent you prophets to warn of your destruction. Then the bombs come and drive Christians to the streets and they retaliate in kind with many deaths of the innocent. The Muslims are sure Christians hate them so the Boko Haram blow up a church and the families of the dead attack Muslims and ensure more hatred, more violence and more pain.

Sunday here, people spend an average of 10.00 USD for lunch. They flock like a hoard of violent people on all you can eat restaurants, do not tip and make messes that would shame them before God.

The waiters and waitresses hate Christians, they are miserly, cheap and complain while the cults smile, hand out tracts and wish everyone well.

I stand with the crying and dying children with my hand out, wondering why they think they are working for God? Callous and blind, they want for themselves and have no time for the poor. I shy from Christians when they march triumphantly like the Sadducee and Pharisees, proclaiming their right to have while looking down on those that have not

Jesus did not do this. He slept on the street with the whores and pimps and befriended the tax collectors and thieves. He blessed the Romans though they were killers, rapists and thieves.

I watch the Nigerian Church try to become Western and yet, Jesus was not Western, but Palestinian and thought it important to feed the 5,000 even though his enemies were there with them, mocking him and waiting for the opportunity to kill him.

God help us, but Matthew 25:31-46 is not a joke and many will cry out and say,, Lord, Lord, didn’t we dance well, sing well and have such fine feasts?

I had a father’s day and was ignored by those that say they love me because I wanted to go to the poor and needy. They want and want and want. I am ashamed to be a Christian.

To be one of those that washes myself, prepares myself to worship God and then will not touch the broken and hurting that I might not be defiled before God. Yet Jesus spoke to one from outside my faith to help a wounded man. A man who was not too busy pleasing God to please God

The food I ate with my family is like poison. I could not sleep. I have an upset stomach knowing that the money spent could have blessed a muslim child that was orphaned by Christians who assaulted their neighbors because someone blew up a church. War begets war begets war. I am ashamed of my Christianity.

And Jesus said,, “who are my brothers and sisters, my mother and fathers, save those that do good to their enemies and return kindness for war. They tend the wounds of their neighbors and feed those, like Jesus, who need to hear. Jesus fed the 5,000 and we know there were those there who wanted him dead. The disciples were attacked and Jesus told them, “What did you expect?” Jesus fed the multitudes of non believers. He had no church. What would happen if all of our buildings were sold and the proceeds were used to bless others and not build newer and bigger churches?

God help us, but Matthew 25:31-46 is not a joke and many will cry out and say,, Lord, Lord, didn’t we dance well, sing well and have such fine feasts? I had a father’s day and was ignored by those that say they love me because I wanted to go to the poor and needy. They want and want and want I am ashamed to be a Christian.

To be one of those that washes myself, prepares myself to worship God and then will not touch the broken and hurting that I might not be defiled before God. Yet Jesus spoke to one from outside my faith to help a wounded man. A man who was not too busy pleasing God to please God

The food I ate with my family is like poison. I could not sleep. I have an upset stomach knowing that the money spent could have blessed a muslim child that was orphaned by Christians who assaulted their neighbors because someone blew up a church. War begets war begets war. I am ashamed of my Christianity.

And Jesus said,, “who are my brothers and sisters, my mother and fathers, save those that do good to their enemies and return kindness for war. They tend the wounds of their neighbors and feed those, like Jesus, who need to hear. Jesus fed the 5,000 and we know there were those there who wanted him dead. The disciples were attacked and Jesus told them, “What did you expect?” Jesus fed the multitudes of non believers. He had no church. What would happen if all of our buildings were sold and the proceeds were used to bless others and not build newer and bigger churches?

I need to go to the streets and I cannot find one Christian that will go. Not one.

They want to organize, prioritize, isolate and indemnify themselves to they are not legally liable for those in need.

They want to make sure that they do not touch the unclean, spend time with Muslims and try to love them into the kingdom but they are ready and willing to go to war and kill them.

Then I will write, you make the book you can tell them of a 33 year missionary who is disgusted with his church, his people and his country.

Who is disgusted that in the face of pain and suffering we who have money buy bigger weapons and kill more of them than they us. Bush imprisoned his enemies. Obama just sends a mindless warhead into villages that kill man, woman, child and beast and he is not even claiming to work for God but it is God’s people that put him there.

I can hear a young child crying. I have nothing to give the child but today we will spend trillions, around the world on our buildings, houses and personal items, believing we are serving a living God. I am a veteran and there is no honor. I am a father and there is no joy. I am a missionary and there is no church willing to close its doors to go and bless those who persecute us, give aid to our enemies and love those that hate us.